Rekindle the Romance, Reignite the Passion and Revive your Marriage or Relationship and...  Find out what True love is!

When the passion has faded and the romance is gone from your marriage or relationship you may look for it elsewhere. But reviving your relationship, rekindling the romance and reigniting the passion in your relationship is much easier than you think and may be much better for you. Here is why and how.  On this page, you will also be explained what true love is.

Every time you enter a new romance the highs are many and the passion runs wild.  You feel happy, refreshed and alive.  This happens because at the beginning of any relationship (and definitely during the flirting stage) your body and your mind are greatly affected by ‘happy hormones’ and ‘happy body chemicals’ ((such as endorphins); it’s a biological phase which takes place at the beginning of every romance, during which you feel alive, cheerful and full of energy.

During the initial attraction phase and at the beginning of any relationship (this phase can last days or as long 1 year) you feel such a high that you are likely to believe you have found ‘the one’, the love of your life.  But, and you need to accept this, all those great feelings have nothing to do with love.  Having those feelings for someone it does not mean that you love that person.  It must mean you are experiencing those crazy hormones due to the initial attraction phase (there are actually basic animal-type hormones biologically created to help us procreate): nothing to do with love.  Some people are addicted to those hormones and they hop from relationship to relationship in order to feel ‘swept off their feet’.  Some people are so unaware that this is taking place that they fall in and out of love and, often, blame it on the other person!

So, when your marriage or relationship has hit that ‘dead’ zone, you need to learn to create real love within it: ideally you should be aware of these phases and should work towards building love from day one of your relationship, not only from the day the passion is gone.  

But how to do this?  How to create passion within your marriage or relationship?

The following are essential steps to ensure the creation of real love and passion in your relationship:

1. Learn to truly care for your partner. This does not mean just affection, it means to care for his/her happiness, his/her goals in life, what he/she loves to do. Learn how your spouse feels loved and express love to him/her in a way that your partner feels it. Give care and love and kindness to your partner every day. Make sure your partner feels loved and appreciated every day. This way you will build love and ‘emotional credit’ from your partner and, at the same time (pay attention to this) you will love your partner more and more. There is a theory about giving love to someone; apparently, the more you love them and perform daily acts of love towards them, the more loving feelings you will have for them. Needless to say, these loving acts need to take place daily from both sides. 

2.  Do fun stuff together.  Whatever ‘fun’ is for both of you, make sure you enjoy your time together at least twice a week by taking yourselves outside the daily ‘grime’ and diving into something really enjoyable and perhaps a little different for both of you.  This could be a hike up a small mountain or through a park, or going to the fun fair together, just the two of you!  Doing fun stuff together as a couple creates a bond of love.  Create fabulous memories, a history of bonding to go back to during challenging times, and work towards new great bonding memories and experiences every week.  For some extra ‘spice’, do some thrilling activity every now and then:  research shows that ‘a thrilling activity’ is great aphrodisiac!  Such activities are, for example, roller-coaster riding and sky-diving (but they don’t have to be so extreme. 

3.  Appreciate your partner and feel gratitude towards him/her.  Even if you think you don’t feel much for your spouse anymore, start by building up appreciation and gratitude towards him or her.  Begin to think of your partner’s good qualities, what is really good about him/her (be honest with yourself and don’t deny your partner’s qualities just because you may be bored with them).  Appreciate what your spouse does for you every day; be grateful for those daily gestures of love towards you every day (whatever they are). 

4. Completely open up to your spouse and help them do the same to you. In order to create true love and real emotional intimacy you need to open up to your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend. This is explained on the page title ‘transference’, which is usually a quick trick to make someone fall in love with you. However, there is real evidence that opening up about everything and anything to your spouse or partner (and of course, have them open up to you the same way on a regular basis) is key to creating true, deep, powerful feelings of love and of ‘being in love’. Do not worry about making yourself vulnerable emotionally: if you chose a good and kind person your vulnerability will be greatly rewarded for this (that’s why choosing a good mate to begin with is essential – for this read the page on soul mates and the page on evolving relationships). You need to truly open up to him/her (and vice versa), share each other’s hearts and souls.